My friend and fellow author Valerie Sherrard posted the following info on the listserve of CANSCAIP, the Canadian Society of Children's Authors, Illustrators and Performers recently:
"For more than 90 years, Canadians who read print have enjoyed free access to public libraries, funded through taxes. For the same amount of time, blind and partially sighted people across Canada have enjoyed free access to the donor-funded CNIB Library, Canada's largest library of Braille and audio materials.
It's inappropriate to expect blind and partially sighted Canadians to rely on a charity to pay for a service that other Canadians enjoy as a basic right of citizenship. Furthermore, CNIB can no longer sustain the $10 million annual operating cost of the library without partnerships with all levels of government. Today, the CNIB Library is in jeopardy, and its services in danger of eroding. Partnerships are needed now to ensure the future sustainability of the library and avoid service reductions.
If you believe that visually impaired Canadians deserve to have their right to read respected, please take a moment to support them through a letter of support (already prepared) here: http://righttoread.cnib.ca/"
Thanks to Valerie's post, many of the writers who participate in the listserve immediately sprang into action. Letters were written and sent, and stories were shared by many about how this vital institution has played a large role in the lives of family members and friends.
We don't know yet what impact the kidlit author contingent will have on this issue, but I'm proud to belong to such a proactive, thoughtful, and community-minded group.
Please lend your voice of support to the CNIB library by clicking on the link and sending off your own letter of support! Mine is on its way today!
Tuesday, January 26, 2010
Sunday, January 17, 2010
What kind of CHEESE are you? And what does it mean if you're Limburger?
As is always the way when writing a book, a lot of my fabulous, fabulous words don't make it into the printed edition - page counts and editor's sensitivities to vulgarity being what they are.
So in the interest of whetting reader's appetites, and salvaging some of those otherwise un-read words, I've decided to post one of the quizzes that just didn't make it into the offical Quiz Book here . Not that this very cheesy quiz isn't completely worthy of inclusion; but in the toss-up between What Kind of Underwear are You? and What Kind of Cheese are You?, well, we all agreed to go with Briefs over Brie.
So get out your lactase pills and lipitor. Answer the questions and follow the instructions. When you are told your cheese name, scroll down to the bottom to find what it says about your inner fromaginality.
Ready, set Go(uda)!
What Kind of Cheese are You? (and what does it mean?)
1. Your favorite sweater is:
a. full of holes.> Go to question 2.
b. blue> Go to question 3.
c. striped. > Go to question 4.
2. Where would you rather go on vacation?
a. To see the fjords of Scandinavia>>>> You are Jarlsberg
b. To ski in the Swiss Alps>>> You are Emmentaler
3. Which character appeals to you most:
a. A mouse detective>>>> You are Stilton
b. A mermaid>>>> You are Danish blue
c. A pirate> go to question 5.
4. what’s your favorite animal?
a. Goat>>>>>>>>>You are Chevre
b. Elephant >>>>>>You are String cheese
c. Sea slug>>>>>>You are Brie
5. Which would you prefer:
a. Eating snails in garlic butter>>>> You are Gorgonzola
b. hunting for treasure in the basement of a German castle owned by a one-eyed monster? >Go to question 6.
c. Bungee jumping from the top of the CN tower.>>>>>go to question 7.
6. Do you consider yourself to be:
a. Daring and adventurous? >>>Go to question 8
b. A class clown > go to question 7
c. Star material > Go to question 10.
7. Which would you rather be:
a. A star goalie> go to question 11
b. A superstar soccer forward> go to question 9
c. A megastar tiddly winks champion go to question 10.
8. Which “book: would you rather read:
a. Escape from valley of the dinosaurs>>>> You are Limburger
b. Sherlock Holmes meets the Earl of Sandwich>>>>>You are Cheddar cheese
c. Soldiers on Skateboards >>>> You are Buffalo Mozzarella
9. Which movie would you rather see:
a. Surfin Safari>>>>>>>>>> You are Monterey Jack
b. Frankenstein meets the Abominable snowman>>>>You are Munster
c. Scooby Dooby Sea-doo >>>You are Cottage cheese
10. How much is 12 x 3?
b. 3 dozen. >>>>> You are Parmagiana
c. I don’t know. >>>You are Cheese curds.
11. Which little pig do you like best?
a. The one who built the straw house>>>> You are Strawberry cream cheese
b. the one that built the stick house>>> You are Cream cheese with chives
c. the one that built the brick house> You are brick cheese
Jarlsberg – You are a little nutty, but get along well with others.
Emmentaler – You are neat, orderly, and cuckoo about clocks.
Stilton – You love the finer things in life – expensive clothes, expensive cars, hedgehogs.
Danish Blue – you prefer to keep to yourself. Others find it difficult to get to know you. Those who know you realize you are very, very strange.
String Cheese – You prefer the simple things in life – dirt bikes, baseball caps, and astrophysics.
Brie – You are soft hearted and have a tendency to pass gas in class.
Gorgonzola – You have strong opinions, many of them incorrect.
Cheddar cheese – You are extremely popular among hamsters and the criminally insane.
Buffalo mozzarella - you tend to be stubborn, with a fondness for wide open spaces and cud.
Monterey Jack – You have a talent for finding things. So get lost.
Munster – your strengths include a commanding presence and small pores.
Parmagiana – You are the life of the party, the heart of the matter, the soul of a pizza.
Cheese curds – You are 100% pure Canadian.
Strawberry cream cheese – You are a little sweet, and very tenderhearted. What’s not to like?
Cream cheese with chives – You’ve got a sharp wit beneath a mild mannered exterior.
Brick – You are solid gold, and just as dense.
Tuesday, January 12, 2010
The Quiz Book for Boys Hits the Bookstores!
They love me. 8 year old boys, that is.
If only the boys had loved me as much in grade 3 as they do now, I'd have been queen of the schoolyard. As my mother told me at least 40,000 times, "No one ever said life is fair."
I've finally figured out (better late than never) what makes the male homo sapiens tick.
Gas.
Yes, it's methane that makes them tick, burble, grunt, explode and giggle like crazy.
Flatulence, it seems, is the universal language of the male. This powerful non-verbal communication method predates symbolic thought and rational discourse. In the same way that laughter communicates safety to the herd, and yawns transfer sleepiness, the fellas send eachother updates of emotional states and hunting prospects via backside aromatics.
With gas being so important to boys, no wonder they love to talk about farts. And anything that relates, no matter how tangentially, to farts. Underwear. Cheese. Alien arm-wrestling.
It took me a long time (one husband and two sons) to figure out this elemental connection. But once I got it, I've been able to reach a niche market - boy readers. The Looney Bay All-Stars series, although it features girls in many prominent roles, appealed mostly to boys. Science on the Loose, with its Famous Fart Experiment, made me an instant celebrity with the Grade 3-6 guys.
When I wrote The Quiz Book for Boys, I pulled out all the stops. I put in as much vaporous silliness as I could. As well as zombies with stinky feet, spy stuff, supervillains, weird tests, and disgustingly poor dental hygiene. The result? One darn funny book that I know boys - and girls - will like.
I see a sticky note from my husband attached to the "How Well Do You Know Your NHL Hockey?" quiz. He says he scored "Hockey Star." There was a smiley face on the note.
I think that counts as a thumbs up.
The Quiz Book for Boys is published by Scholastic Canada in French and English. It's available in Canadian bookstores now and on-line through all the major players.
If only the boys had loved me as much in grade 3 as they do now, I'd have been queen of the schoolyard. As my mother told me at least 40,000 times, "No one ever said life is fair."
I've finally figured out (better late than never) what makes the male homo sapiens tick.
Gas.
Yes, it's methane that makes them tick, burble, grunt, explode and giggle like crazy.
Flatulence, it seems, is the universal language of the male. This powerful non-verbal communication method predates symbolic thought and rational discourse. In the same way that laughter communicates safety to the herd, and yawns transfer sleepiness, the fellas send eachother updates of emotional states and hunting prospects via backside aromatics.
With gas being so important to boys, no wonder they love to talk about farts. And anything that relates, no matter how tangentially, to farts. Underwear. Cheese. Alien arm-wrestling.
It took me a long time (one husband and two sons) to figure out this elemental connection. But once I got it, I've been able to reach a niche market - boy readers. The Looney Bay All-Stars series, although it features girls in many prominent roles, appealed mostly to boys. Science on the Loose, with its Famous Fart Experiment, made me an instant celebrity with the Grade 3-6 guys.
When I wrote The Quiz Book for Boys, I pulled out all the stops. I put in as much vaporous silliness as I could. As well as zombies with stinky feet, spy stuff, supervillains, weird tests, and disgustingly poor dental hygiene. The result? One darn funny book that I know boys - and girls - will like.
I see a sticky note from my husband attached to the "How Well Do You Know Your NHL Hockey?" quiz. He says he scored "Hockey Star." There was a smiley face on the note.
The Quiz Book for Boys is published by Scholastic Canada in French and English. It's available in Canadian bookstores now and on-line through all the major players.
Wednesday, November 25, 2009
Top Tips from the Treadmill
Everything I know about writing I learned from running. Really.
1. One step at a time. You don’t try and conquer a mountain in one go. You just go slowly, slowly, watching your feet make a simple pattern beneath you. It’s the same with writing. You don’t bang out an entire opus in an afternoon. It’s one word at a time, one para at a time, one chapter at a time.
2. Showing up is half the battle. I knew, when I started running, that if I set a huge goal, like “run marathon” I’d freak myself out so bad I’d never get out of bed. So instead, I made a mini-goal – just get your butt to the gym. That’s all, I’d say to myself – you don’t even have to run when you get there. Of course once you’ve got your gym gear on and you’re looking at the treadmill, it’s pretty obvious you’ll step on it…and maybe even reach your daily target. But I didn’t start out with anything other than “Get there.” And yes, it’s the same with writing. Don’t freak yourself thinking about how much work lies ahead before you complete the novel. Just commit to sitting at your desk. Every day. You don’t even have to write when you get there. But I bet you will.
3. Make the time. I decided I wanted to run 10K, and lose 10 lbs. I knew that in order to reach these goals, I’d have to seriously increase my time at the gym, both to burn the required number of calories and get my fitness level and speed up to par. But time after time, I’d find that I’d left myself barely enough time to find an available machine. Then I blocked off two hours a day to work out. That gave me enough time to meet my 500 cal goal while moving at a pathetically slow pace, the only pace I could muster after 4 years “on the bench” with a knee injury. And lo and behold, the weight started coming off, and my running speed began to pick up. Within a month, I was moving fast enough to blast through those 500 cals in less than an hour.
That’s the way it works with writing too. You can’t expect to complete a novel if you only write during commercial breaks. Allot the time. You’ll start to see the results.
4. Stretch. If I don’t warm up and stretch those rubberbands I call muscles before and after running, I creep around like a lil ol lady the next day. But if I do stretch, I run better, and feel better too. Writers also need to stretch. First, you need to limber up. Start by writing something easy, or by editing a previous piece of writing. But that’s not all. Don’t forget to stretch in that other way too – by pushing yourself past your normal limits. Sure, it might hurt a bit. But the long term results will be more fluid and limber writing.
5. It's easier with a friend. The miles disappear beneath your feet when you're yakking with a buddy. Writing is also less arduous when you have a pal to help you through the rough patches. Join a writer's group. Go to Writer's Association meetings (like http://www.canscaip.org/.) Find folks who understand what you do and why you do it - friends who can cheer you when you succeed, and kick you in the tush when you are feeling sorry for yourself.
6. Life is more fun when you're fit. You have more energy, more ideas, and more peace of mind. Running gave me the ability to perservere through the rotten times - and Lord, there were rotten times. I spent less time fretting, and more time laughing - an important difference when you get a gazillion rejection letters in your inbox.
Although I started out as the ultimate couch-clutching bookworm, I wound up becoming a real fitness hound. Naturally, my interests and passions slopped over into my work. For example, in my upcoming book, The Quiz Book for Boys (Scholastic Canada, January '10), I sneaked some fitness-oriented material in between the kooky quizzes such as What's Your Underwear Style? and Werewolf, Vampire or Zombie? The quizzes allow kids to test their fitness levels by doing pushups, chin ups, sit ups and other simple activities. With the trend toward childhood obesity, I think kids really need to be able to evaluate their own health in a concrete - and fun - way.
I would have never come up with The Quiz Book for Boys if I hadn't become a runner myself. Perhaps this fact illustrates that life is a karmic wheel, or dare I say, a cosmic treadmill? Your art will go where your feet lead. So maybe the best way to kick-start your career as a writer is to lace up your Avias and kick it into high gear.
1. One step at a time. You don’t try and conquer a mountain in one go. You just go slowly, slowly, watching your feet make a simple pattern beneath you. It’s the same with writing. You don’t bang out an entire opus in an afternoon. It’s one word at a time, one para at a time, one chapter at a time.
2. Showing up is half the battle. I knew, when I started running, that if I set a huge goal, like “run marathon” I’d freak myself out so bad I’d never get out of bed. So instead, I made a mini-goal – just get your butt to the gym. That’s all, I’d say to myself – you don’t even have to run when you get there. Of course once you’ve got your gym gear on and you’re looking at the treadmill, it’s pretty obvious you’ll step on it…and maybe even reach your daily target. But I didn’t start out with anything other than “Get there.” And yes, it’s the same with writing. Don’t freak yourself thinking about how much work lies ahead before you complete the novel. Just commit to sitting at your desk. Every day. You don’t even have to write when you get there. But I bet you will.
3. Make the time. I decided I wanted to run 10K, and lose 10 lbs. I knew that in order to reach these goals, I’d have to seriously increase my time at the gym, both to burn the required number of calories and get my fitness level and speed up to par. But time after time, I’d find that I’d left myself barely enough time to find an available machine. Then I blocked off two hours a day to work out. That gave me enough time to meet my 500 cal goal while moving at a pathetically slow pace, the only pace I could muster after 4 years “on the bench” with a knee injury. And lo and behold, the weight started coming off, and my running speed began to pick up. Within a month, I was moving fast enough to blast through those 500 cals in less than an hour.
That’s the way it works with writing too. You can’t expect to complete a novel if you only write during commercial breaks. Allot the time. You’ll start to see the results.
4. Stretch. If I don’t warm up and stretch those rubberbands I call muscles before and after running, I creep around like a lil ol lady the next day. But if I do stretch, I run better, and feel better too. Writers also need to stretch. First, you need to limber up. Start by writing something easy, or by editing a previous piece of writing. But that’s not all. Don’t forget to stretch in that other way too – by pushing yourself past your normal limits. Sure, it might hurt a bit. But the long term results will be more fluid and limber writing.
5. It's easier with a friend. The miles disappear beneath your feet when you're yakking with a buddy. Writing is also less arduous when you have a pal to help you through the rough patches. Join a writer's group. Go to Writer's Association meetings (like http://www.canscaip.org/.) Find folks who understand what you do and why you do it - friends who can cheer you when you succeed, and kick you in the tush when you are feeling sorry for yourself.
6. Life is more fun when you're fit. You have more energy, more ideas, and more peace of mind. Running gave me the ability to perservere through the rotten times - and Lord, there were rotten times. I spent less time fretting, and more time laughing - an important difference when you get a gazillion rejection letters in your inbox.
Although I started out as the ultimate couch-clutching bookworm, I wound up becoming a real fitness hound. Naturally, my interests and passions slopped over into my work. For example, in my upcoming book, The Quiz Book for Boys (Scholastic Canada, January '10), I sneaked some fitness-oriented material in between the kooky quizzes such as What's Your Underwear Style? and Werewolf, Vampire or Zombie? The quizzes allow kids to test their fitness levels by doing pushups, chin ups, sit ups and other simple activities. With the trend toward childhood obesity, I think kids really need to be able to evaluate their own health in a concrete - and fun - way.
I would have never come up with The Quiz Book for Boys if I hadn't become a runner myself. Perhaps this fact illustrates that life is a karmic wheel, or dare I say, a cosmic treadmill? Your art will go where your feet lead. So maybe the best way to kick-start your career as a writer is to lace up your Avias and kick it into high gear.
Saturday, November 14, 2009
Smelly Smelly Cinderelly
Smelly, smelly Cinderelly
Turned the prince to royal jelly
When he caught a whiff of her
Pungent underarm odeur
Gassed by Cindy’s potent charms
He swooned into her ample arms
And as the luckless royal fell
He succumbed to her ripe smell
The slipper sealed the prince’s fate
When his aromatic date
Stuck her stinky foot in it
And alas! The slipper fit!
So the prince and Cindy wed
But soon the smell killed that prince dead
And that’s the tale I have to telly
Of smelly, smelly Cinderelly.
Smelly Smelly Cinderelly by Helaine Becker
copyright 2007
This morning I had a quick correspondence with a twitter pal, @feedtheteacher, who was teaching a Saturday morning class. Teacher was asking for contributors' favorite fairy tales, and this is the one I supplied. It's one of the more popular pieces I read when I visit schools. I've noticed that with kids, you can never go wrong with stuff that stinks.
This poem is included in the kooky book of miscellany I wrote a few years ago called Mother Goose Unplucked. Jokes, comics, puzzles, games, and yes, poems, all poke fun at familiar Mother Goose rhymes and fairy tale characters. I personally think it's the funniest and cleverest book I've written; I particularly like the Ugly Duckling origami in which you can first make the ugly duckling, and then turn the figure into a swan. It took me ages to work out how to do that one! And I like the Humpty Dumpty tangrams, in which you take the broken egg pieces and put them pack together again, or use them to make a wide variety of fairy tale birdies. I'm also fond of the Wee Willie Winkie mapping puzzle, and the Jack Jumped over the Candlestick game, and the comic about Old MacDonald's Dog..
Hmmm...I think I'll forget the errands and just go back and reread the whole thing. There's nothing an author likes better than a truly appreciative audience for her books. ;)
Monday, November 9, 2009
The Insecto-Files and What's the Big Idea? Are Launched!
How can flies walk on the ceiling without falling onto your head? More than 30+ kids and countless adults ('coz I didn't count 'em!) got the chance to find out at yesterday's very buzzy book launch at McNally Robinson in Toronto. It was my first book launch ever, so I was just a tad excited - and a little nervous. I knew friends and family that had never witnessed me in action would get to finally see what I get paid the big bucks for - acting like an idiot.
Friend and fab author Patricia Storms took these pictures. What, you ask, is hanging from that plastic cup? It's a paper fly, which kids cut out from photocopies of a page from The Insecto-Files. By dipping their feet in "miracle stick solution" - aka ordinary tap water - the flies were made to stick to the cup and "walk" upside down. A little adhesion magic for the under 12 set! 
Many thanks to author Helene Boudreau (Acadian Star, Nimbus) (pictured at left) for bringing the cuties in costume, and author Jennifer Lanthier (Hazel Frump series, HarperCollins) for her scissors skills!We also enjoyed visits from the creme de la creme of Canadian kidlit - Mahtab Narsimhan (Silver Birch Winner for The Third Eye) and Debra Kerbel (Girl on the Other Side) - and parenting poobah Kathy Buckworth (The Blackberry Diaries).
Also, shout outs to Kendal Gerard from Owlkids who masterminded and organized everything, and the wonderful staff at McNally Robinson, Don Mills, for hosting the event.Giving out handmade chocolate ladybugs from Toronto's Chocolate Concepts.
Thursday, November 5, 2009
Top Ten World-Changing Inventions?
Not surprisingly, all of the Museum's pics had made my shortlist. Their number 1 choice, X-rays, is featured on the "Doctor's Office" pages in my book.
But is the X-ray really #1? When I visit with school kids, after heated discussions, we decide that neither x-rays nor x-box are the top invention of all time. Instead, we opt for the spinning wheel.
What???? Do kids really have a soft spot in their hearts for this homely, old-fashioned device? Is their love for threadmaking really intense enough to push even mp3s, computers and TV out of the winner's circle?
You betcha. Especially once kids realize that without needles and thread, spinning wheels and looms, they'd be playing video games in the buff. In this frosty Canadian climate, kids catch on quickly that comfy, cozy clothing is the key to, well, everything.
What other inventions did the London Science Museum select for their list? You can find out at http://www.newscientist.com/gallery/scientific-objects-that-changed-the-world.
For my picks, check out What's the Big Idea?, available at bookstores now. Just don't forget to don your woolies before you head out.
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